


Talking In Circles

by screwtodayimsleeping



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Feels, M/M, Sad, Shadam, adashi, sad feels, shiro trying to send messages back to his old fiance, short & sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-23
Updated: 2018-07-23
Packaged: 2019-06-15 04:49:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15405339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/screwtodayimsleeping/pseuds/screwtodayimsleeping
Summary: "Hi Adam. It's been a while, hasn't it?"





	Talking In Circles

**Author's Note:**

> OK this was actually written by a good discord friend named Star who doesn't have her own ao3 account but still wanted to make something in celebration of learning about Shiro and Adam. It's soft and bittersweet and is beautiful and simple.   
> I think this is the story of Shiro trying to record a message for Adam to send back to earth.   
> It's all bittersweet in the end, isn't it.

This is Takashi Shirogane, recording from coordinates- no. 

 

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. . . Adam, I- um. I-

  
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Hi, Adam. It's been a while, hasn’t it?

  
. . . 

  
That's not funny, is it.    
  
You have a lot of questions, probably. I can't answer everything from this far away. I don't know what you're going to ask or what you want to know. But-    
  
The information is in the debriefing. Um, you should watch that first, if you're watching this. I can't explain more from here. But I thought you should know. I'm not dead.    
  
Keith told me they called it pilot error. I'm not surprised. I think I knew it was going to go wrong somehow. I thought it was worth the risk. I guess I never expected- aliens. And everything else.   
  
. . .    
  
You were right, Adam.

  
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I don't regret it. Leaving for Kerberos, leaving you- I don't regret it. I can't. 

 

Do you remember Katie? Katie Holt, related to Sam and Matt Holt. She's the Green Paladin. She's fighting on the front lines in this war. She's 15. 

 

They're children, Adam. They’re children and I’m barely older than they are. I can't protect them. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know how to keep them safe. But I have to. 

 

I was chosen to be the Black Paladin. The universe is counting on me. This team is counting on me. I won't fail them. 

 

I'm not a great role model- but at least they're not as alone as they could have been. At least I have the chance to protect them. If that mission to Kerberos was what was needed to get me here, then I don't regret it.    
  
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Back at the Garrison- do you remember that introductory astronomy class?  They had us learn the night sky? You tried so hard to teach me, but despite everything the one star I could never find was Polaris. Dumb, I know. 

 

I can't find anything now. I don't know the stars here. 

 

They have star maps. Of course they do, they have some self-respect. But they're all written in languages I can't read, so I guess that's a shame. 

 

We've been up here for- years. You know how long better than I do, but . . . 

 

I miss Earth. I miss the sunrise, and- and that mac and cheese the Garrison used to serve. You know, the one you made fun of me for liking? 

 

It feels like a different lifetime. 

 

I miss you, Adam.

 

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You need to know that I might not come back. 

 

It feels cruel, to give you false hope like this. You probably think I’m dead, and then finding out I’m not, and then finding out I am, again? Seems a little cruel.

 

Maybe I shouldn’t send this at all.

 

But I want you to know, Adam. I want to tell you so many things, in case I never get the chance to again-

Adam, I loved you. Still do.

 

I hope you don’t, though. I hope you moved on. You’re a good person, Adam. You don’t deserve to go through this. 

 

I think I get it now, why you couldn’t wait for me. 

 

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Adam, I wanted-

 

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Adam, I should-

 

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Adam, I need to-

 

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Adam, I have tried to record this thing at least ten times now and I am getting nowhere.

 

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Adam.

 

I’m sorry. I can’t answer your questions. I can’t come back. I might not ever come back. I can’t give you what you want, but I wanted to apologize.

 

I’m sorry I left. I’m sorry I hurt you. I’m sorry this happened- to you, to us.

 

I’m not asking for forgiveness, but I hope that this, at least, provides some closure.

 

Stay safe, Adam.

  
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**Author's Note:**

> Please comment for Star so we can appreciate her and her feels filled writing!


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